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They Did What?: 

5 alarm clocks so evil they might actually work

From smart sheets and sleep trackers to a wearable wristband that’ll record the TV while you doze, there is no shortage of options for sorting out your sleep pattern. For a special breed of heavy sleeper though, waking up in the morning requires a firmer approach – more akin to sonic warfare than a gentle prodding.

If that sounds like you, then you’ve probably already got a complex system of alarms to help you beat the snooze button. But what if you could replace those with just one killer clock that’ll force (and we mean force) you out of bed whether you like it or not? Try these on for size.

1) Sonic Bomb

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When we said sonic warfare earlier, we weren’t joking. The Sonic Bomb is designed to shock you onto your feet with a deafening 113 db volume that’s sure to rattle both your windows and your eardrums. If that wasn’t enough, it also comes with a ‘super shaker’ that slides under your mattress to quite literally shake you out of bed. Good luck snoozing after that rude awakening.

2) Clocky

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While the Sonic Bomb is an assault on the senses, there’s more than one way to skin a cat (so we’ve heard) – and that also applies to waking up. Clocky is the original runaway alarm clock, first stirring you with a high-pitched beep which it continues to make as it wheels of of your bedside table into a dark corner. If you want it to stop, then we’re afraid you’re going to have to get up and find it.

3) Wake ‘N’ Shake

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Getting up is one thing, but for some heavy sleepers it’s all too easy to collapse back onto the mattress even after collecting a runaway clock. That’s where Wake ‘N’ Shake comes in, an alarm clock which requires you to complete a morning workout in order to shut off. The app comes with a number of different intensities to suit your needs, getting your blood pumping to shake away the tiredness.

4) Alarmy (Sleep if you can)

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Alarmy might be billed as “the world’s most annoying alarm clock,” but actually we think its solution is pretty clever. When the alarm sounds, no amount of snoozing or shaking will stop it, but instead you’ll have to drag yourself to a set location within your house and take a picture. You might select your bathroom sink or shower, for instance, so by the time you’ve got yourself up to take the snap you might as well get on with your morning routine.

5) Money-shredding alarm

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Finally, we finish on an alarm clock so evil and so extreme that it doesn’t exist for legal reasons (It’s a federal crime to destroy US currency). The concept was simple; Get up when your alarm sounds and not a moment later, or risk having your hard-earned wages torn up into thin strips of paper. While shredding currency may be illegal, though, you could hack something together yourself and replace the money with another important document.

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