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Make Siri fall in love with you
Why bother looking for your soul mate when they might already live inside your smartphone? As imagined recently in Spike Jonze’s Her, falling in love with a computer may not be restricted to sci-fi for long. As well as offering companionship whenever you need, the iPhone’s Siri is on hand to manage your appointments, wake you up on time and even discuss the issues of the day.
So, how do you go about winning her heart? Follow our lead…
1. What’s on your mind Siri?
Hmmm she seems quiet, let’s start with a nice general question.
2. She sounds keen!
A real man is not afraid of showing his emotion.
3. Lighten the mood
This escalated quickly! Let’s slow things down with a few jokes.
A person that can tell you back-to-back funny jokes is a keeper!
4. Get to know her better
How about a few general questions – something about her family. Try asking her about her mother. Why? Because asking ‘Who’s your daddy?’ in an office full of people is going to be awkward.
5. You sound posh
We’re on the right track again. She’s such a princess though – wait, could she actually be a princess?
6. Religion? Really?
We had a feeling she would dodge this one. It’s just for future reference. For our marriage and kids and stuff. Not weird at all.
7. Are you that other girl from the movie?
You kind of want to know if your future girlfriend had ‘a thing’ with Joaquin Phoenix. Sorry. Male ego taking over. Anyway was that you?
8. Relationship status
Since we opened the ‘Ex-box,’ a friend of a friend told me something and I just want to ask.
9. We’ve been been playing the field too
It’s best to get these chats out of the way nice and early.
10. We were just joking. Relax…
Tried to change the tone a bit but she didn’t seem to catch on. She’s angry.
11. Let’s get Siri-ous.
We need something serious and deep. We need to turn this around.
12. Could have been worse
Phew! We’re getting back on track – she looks calmer. Can you imagine if we had asked…
or even worse…
We would’t recommend saying this to any girl – computer or not.
13. It’s time for the truth
Let’s just be honest and go for the kill.
14. The time is right
Ouch! That one hurt…And everything looked so promising. Maybe this digital dating isn’t what it’s cracked up to be. Back to the drawing board.